A Testimony of God’s Grace
I was baptized, following a “profession of faith,” at age 10. I sat in the church pew with my wonderful Christian family but I was still spiritually dead. I was empty in my heart. I recited my Bible verses on my way from RAs (Royal Ambassadors) to Training Union to church choir to youth camp, but I was still dead on the inside. I looked great to all my Christian friends and family but had no spiritual life in me. But that’s what a whitewashed tomb does (Matthew 23:27 NIV). My appearances were misleading. My heart was hard. My heart wasn’t edified by the Bible and I wasn’t concerned with anyone but myself. If you asked me then, I would have told you I believe in Jesus and knew that when I was to die I would go to Heaven and NOT Hell. The only problem was that there was no evidence of Christ in my actions, thoughts, and words or that my life had been transformed. I was DEAD.
But I am no more!
After the birth of my third daughter in 2009, something started happening. Doors starting closing on me on worldly things that I was trying to pursue. It took me awhile, but I finally realized that it was God that was closing those doors. He was turning me away from those other things and pointing me towards Him. And Jesus Christ has changed my heart and life.
Spiritual transformation has happened! It is evident to me deeply, beyond my external words and actions. I see myself and others differently. Sin, deeply rooted in me that society calls normal, has been brought to my attention through biblical reading, teachings and conviction by the Holy Spirit of God Himself. I am finding forgiveness in Christ and victory over sin. I now know Jesus and I treasure Him above all else.
I was baptized again just following my 32nd birthday after a year-long conviction to do so. I analyzed, through my limited earthly eyes, why I needed to be re-baptized. In addition to simply obeying the Spirit’s conviction, there were two reasons I could come up with. First, my hope was to glorify my God by acknowledging He saved me and that His grace is POWERFUL. This was obedience to Christ’s command to be baptized after salvation. The second opportunity public baptism might provide was to awaken someone who witnessed the baptism. There is quite possibly someone who witnessed the baptism or someone who is reading this now who believes they are saved but are not. It is my hope, through God’s grace, they will be, like I was, AWAKENED.
I’ve experienced repentance and the shame of past sin.
My sins have been forgiven.
My heart has been softened.
My past church experiences have been used by God for His glory.
My thinking has been transformed as I fight sin daily.
“Teach us, oh Father, Your wisdom to search, ‘til we embrace all Your love for the church. Let Your baptism become our sure oath. Help us, oh Savior, to honor them both.”
Jesus, I’m committed to You. I love You and I’m all in!